Existential loneliness
What is loneliness? Being lonely is a fate, because we are born alone and we will die alone. There is nothing that you can do about it. Yet, most of the time we try to convince ourselves that we are not alone.
During childhood we cling ourselves to our family, always afraid of being left alone, fear of being abandoned in this unknown world. There is nothing wrong in it, since it springs from innocence. When we are parting from our family, we seek security in our peer-groups. Then we seek for a romantic companion, believing that it will last forever. All because of our fear of being left alone, that we seek for other's company all the time.
The same thing happens in our society. At first we feel safe in our family. Then we seek for security in our neighborhood. Then we try to find something common between us, so we seek security in so-much-invented states, nations, races, etc. All because of our fear of being alone.
So, why do we spend so much energy for finding companionship if we know that they are all illusion? That all the companionship is only temporary, and will ceased soon or later.
The only secure place is within ourselves. We have in each of us a safe haven that can not be touched by others. A safe yet a lonesome one.
During childhood we cling ourselves to our family, always afraid of being left alone, fear of being abandoned in this unknown world. There is nothing wrong in it, since it springs from innocence. When we are parting from our family, we seek security in our peer-groups. Then we seek for a romantic companion, believing that it will last forever. All because of our fear of being left alone, that we seek for other's company all the time.
The same thing happens in our society. At first we feel safe in our family. Then we seek for security in our neighborhood. Then we try to find something common between us, so we seek security in so-much-invented states, nations, races, etc. All because of our fear of being alone.
So, why do we spend so much energy for finding companionship if we know that they are all illusion? That all the companionship is only temporary, and will ceased soon or later.
The only secure place is within ourselves. We have in each of us a safe haven that can not be touched by others. A safe yet a lonesome one.
posted by Oni Suryaman at 7:03 pm
4 Comments:
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Kalo bener semua ini lantaran orang begitu takutnya menjadi sendirian (ato kesepian), dan "semua itu ilusi", maka kata-kata Bung (atau Non?) sendiri juga ilusi. Kecuali pemikiran Bung disimpen rapet-rapet dan cuma buat Bung sendiri, biar Bung puas. Tapi mungkin memang begitu ya maksud Bung ... hehe atau saya yang kurang kerjaan memasuki blog orang yang - siapa tahu - ga boleh dimasuki orang (meski tersedia fasilitas comment).
Hanya saja, kadang kita terlalu sibuk memikirkan kalimat yang pas, argumen yang tepat, serta diksi yang lihai cuma buat membenarkan (apa sih kebenaran itu?) daerah abu-abu kita yang tidak nyaman. Kalau Bung ga setuju, mungkin tanpa sadar dengan begitu Bung setuju. Tapi tidak pun ga papa.
Karena saya juga sering dan merindukan kesepian.
mnrt ku pribadi. org merasa kesepian hanya bila ia merasa tidak bahagia (titik rendah/nol) :)
Kata-kata penulis dalam merangkaikan kalimat ini begitu menusuk hati, sungguh suatu bahasa yang bagus untuk didengarkan walaupun saya kurang "sreg" dengan kalimat "kita dilahirkan sendiri dan akan mati sendiri pula" bagaimana kalo bayi kembar?
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